Self-talk is an interesting mechanism of the human mind. Deep within our subconscious is a constant loop of various statements that are determining how we show up in our life. I remember the first time someone introduced me to the concept of manifestation and the power of thoughts. The idea of my thoughts creating my reality sounded bonkers. That is, until I started paying attention to the thoughts that roll around in my mind all the time.
After years of practicing mindfulness and taking time to sit with myself in silence to connect with the various thoughts in my mind, I started to notice some interesting patterns. I remember a time in my life when I felt like I had no one in my life who I could count on and that every time I trusted someone, they only let me down. Well, after spending some time with myself and learning more about my subconscious mind, I found buried beneath my awareness was this perpetuating thought that no one can be trusted, and everyone is out for themselves. Talk about you're self-fulfilling prophecy, am I right?
The important thing about discovering that thought is that I was able to shift it. I started to believe that people CAN be trusted and that the people close to me truly have my best interest at heart. This completely changed my world for the better. I began actively reaching out to people for support when I needed it and offering my own support to others when they were in need. I stopped thinking so much about how people were against me or letting me down and started noticing all the things I appreciated about the people around me.
Seriously, shifting just that one thought was like someone sprinkled magic fairy dust all over me and I suddenly became this incredibly lucky person. My whole life is a million times better from the shifting of just one thought. Imagine what's possible with the shifting of all the toxic thoughts that live in the mind.
I share this example because it's important to understand that there is so much happening in our minds at such a speed that we are scarcely aware of the many thoughts that occur on repeat just beneath the surface of our consciousness. Believe me when I say that manifestation is real and if you don't like something about yourself, your life, your relationships, etc... then I can almost guarantee you've got a toxic thought pattern buried deep in that subconscious of yours manifesting shit that you don't want.
It might sound too easy - "think happy thoughts and good things will happen" - well, it's not actually that easy. It is that simple; but it's easier said than done. It has taken me years of work in various forms to break away from some of my toxic thought patterns. I have worked with therapists, coaches, invested in personal development courses, read countless books, spent hours meditating and journaling, and pushing myself out of my comfort zone repeatedly. All this has brought me to where I am today, which upon looking back at the person I was 10 years ago, where I am today is FAR beyond my wildest dreams.
My work, of course, is still unfinished. I am STILL working so hard to shift my thought patterns around my body image to this day and as far as I've come with so many areas of my life, I haven't quite mastered this one. I would bet that there are a lot of women out there with a similar struggle. However, my experience has taught me that I can shift my thoughts and I can create the life of my dreams. That means I can do the same thing with my body. I can do it with my finances. I can do it with my relationships.
I can conjure up the most incredible existence I can experience with the simple act of paying attention to my thoughts and choosing to shift the ones that don't contribute to that incredible existence. It's just a matter of taking a stand for myself and deciding that I am worth the work and the struggle that it takes to make my dreams a reality. I am worth the discomfort of getting to know my subconscious and my toxic thoughts. I am worth the challenge of learning to love those thoughts for what they are and letting them go when they no longer serve my best self. I am worth the tears and the pain of loss when I shed an old identity to allow another part of my authentic self shine.
My goal is to keep my self-talk in check and let it empower me to be my best and most authentic self. I recognise the power of my self-talk and I understand the importance of paying attention when it's dis-empowering or toxic. I invite you to consider your own existence and decide if you are living the life you want as the person you feel you're meant to be. If you're wishing to be somewhere or someone else all the time, you might have some toxic thoughts that need your attention. Your self-talk might be keeping you down and holding you back. Give yourself the gift of paying attention and doing the work to shift your self-talk. You are worth it.